Just too old for this.

I think I have hit a tolerance wall.  My filter is starting to erode for my online class discussions. 
One of the project I have to work on is a proposal for an app college students need.  it needs to be multimedia  (ie, make a powerpoint with a video in it and some pictures, maybe some other graphics and a chart/graph for some rando statistics)

This is so below my skill set.

I feel like this class is worthless.  I spent 6 hours on my last project.  we were supposed to spend 2.5 weeks on creating it.  I spent 6 hours TOTAL in one sitting- scanning references and writing around high points with numbers.  I got a 96%  4 points off.  mainly because I didn't do any long quotes to show I know how to indent a paragraph quote.

well, maybe this class isn't completely worthless.  my BS skills are improving. 

And this is the point I keep coming back to- if this little effort is needed to get an "A", what in the world kind of standard is my work being compared to?  and what are the other papers looking like if my prof says "BRAVO" of my 6-hours-of-constantly-rolling-my-eyes-while-I-worked-on-it paper?  Seriously, that total tripe I turned it only had 4 points taken off...4.  What kind of degree is this going to be worth if my work is judged so poorly.

I am SO glad I dropped out of college at 21 and never finished my english degree.  if I had finished, I would probably be JUST like this guy- unable to see through the crappy content because it uses the techniques taught.

Bub's path diverting?

We are at the point where we have to decide Bub's educational path.  We have a choice to keep him in an primarily educational setting, or start him 1 year early on functional skills/life-skills as the primary focus of his education.

I'm not ready for this decision.

And hormones....at 45 I can't rule out the reality of hormones jumping in to bring the drama back into the decision making.

There is never a good time to sit and think things through, much less get things accomplished well.

Guess keeping on keeping on is the best I've got right now.

prayers all- N

Survival tips for a Autism Dx- year 14

I tried to post this as a PAGE so it's easy to click on, but I have been out of the blogger-world so long, what I thought I needed to do, isn't really working the way I remember it working...

So I will just have it as a post and repost occasionally, unless I figure out what I couldn't figure out.
It happens.  lol


1- Breathe.  No one dies from Autism.


2- FIND HELP AND INFORMATION:  do not listen to people who quote Oprah, Dr Oz or any other talk show.  Find legitimate sources.  Ask your Doctor.  Ask your Nurse.  Talk to the School Counselor. Get books/resources from your library.

    2b- Don't believe everything you read on the web.  Be careful of what you try and always clear it with your Doctor first.  There are MANY unscrupulous people who will take advantage of parents who are despairing over their child's diagnosis.

    2c- Ask for referrals!  To Speech therapists, Occupational therapist, Physical therapists.  Ask about alternate therapies like Hippotherapy, hydrotherapy, diet modifications, visual therapies, ABA therapy, PEX-communication, AACs. Signing, etc...  No one thing works for every child.  Ask about and try different things!

    2d- Ask about financial supports, Medicaid, Social Security, Easter Seals, Autism Speaks.  You don't known what kind of help you can get if you don't ask for it!  Screw your pride, no one has a baby thinking "I do, I do, I do hope he has autism".  it's a shocker.  it's ok.  it's ok to ask for help too.


3- Find another autism-parents to talk to.  Find one who is about where you are so you know you aren't alone.  Find another one who has an older child than yours so you have hope, and be that one to someone else down the road.  If you are lucky enough to be in an area with a support group, join it!


4- Right now, be strong, for YOU.  You will get stares, you will get horrible people making judgments about you, your parenting, and your child.  You experience public meltdowns.  You will have escapes and elopements.  You will find yourself wanting to be a puddle of you crying on the floor.  The first few years (at the least) your child will be clueless about this.  Learn how to be strong NOW, so when they do start to notice outside themselves you can be strong for them.


5- Don't blame yourself or your spouse.  "for better or for worse"  This is "worse" time.  keep each other's back, support each other against the world.  Build them up.  Parenting autism is hard, it's even harder if you are doing it alone.


6- Don't ignore/minimize/compare your neuro-typical child/children to your child with autism.  They have to live with autism too, and it affects them in ways you can't even imagine.  Your neuro-typical kids' emotions bounce from love, to compassion, to confusion, to resentment, to jealousy, to fierce protectiveness, to pity, and more.  ALL your kids need you to love and pay attention to them.  Each kiddo needs to know they are just as important as the one with special needs.  Treat them that way.

2019 Update

Thus far in 2019:

I imitated Quasimodo with a "facial explosion" due to a peri-orbital cellulitis stemming from a suspected spider bite. *see below*

I had a fun 2.5 day stay at the hospital of my former employment. At least I was a happy non-needy patient  ;)    (ps- I'm *not* winking in these photos...my eye is swollen shut)

I used all my saved PTO.  Zbug came to visit me.  She hugged me and told me,

"It's not your time yet, mom."


...
...
...

Somehow I didn't laugh right when she said that, but after she left, the Nurses and I laughed long and hard.  *Still kinda laughing*

I did start college ...AGAIN...  *I really feel too old for this..I am just a tired little woman.

So far I'm doing really well, but my 4th class starts in 2 days, so I'm just a little nervous about managing all four, plus family, plus work, plus needing to exercise, plus needing sleep.

see, this is why I am a "plus" kinda gal.  lol  (Also why I need to exercise more)

I managed to weed ONE of our 12 garden beds last weekend (spring break).  we are behind on our planting...again.  one of these years we will be on target, but not this year.

Joe is starting his own apiary.  Yes, there will be a beehive delivered to our home on 4/1/19, sans the bees tho.  Joe is hoping to capture a swarm with the help of one of our church family members who is a real, live, bee-keeper. 

So the zoo of my home will now include 1 dog, 3 cats, x to the nth bees, 2 kids, a husband, and uncountable dust-mites.  Oh yeah, also a varying quantity of spiders that bite your face at night while you sleep.  can't forget about those.... *See above*

So I truck on, I mean to write more, but I don't. 
Praying your lives are filled with the peace of Christ, who is my hope!

Nubs  :)

2019 - the madness

Happy New year!

2019 is going to be crazy.
My team doubled in size...
I'm going to take 12-15 credits starting 1/22/19 (trying to fix the math issue..hopefully just 12 credits)

I continue to have 2 kids and a Husband...and 3 cats...and a dog...and uncounted dust-mites....

I somehow think I will be able to do all that and garden too....

woot.  lol!