Sunday, November 27, 2011

Amazing Day, thank you Hartley Family.

Today Joe & I struggled w/ whether or not to brave a church service, and then if we did, what church to go to.  We have been struggling with this for a few months for various reasons, one of which that we publicly acknowledge is that the standard 10-11am service start times really wreck havoc on Zber's nap and the rest of our day is that much harder...and as I have stated before, Sundays are typically hard.

Anyhow, we decided to suck it up and go to our "home" church, mainly because I didn't feel up to being in "make new friends while struggling w/ my run-away son" mode.  it gets hard.  I have to be super cheery to do it.  I'm not super cheery lately.  so we get to church, Zber makes a dash for the nursery...what?  She really wanted to be in the nursery.  who am I to argue w/ my child when she gets a stubborn streak surpassing only her father's?  fine, the lady in the nursery is wonderful, and just loves Zber, so one less distraction to deal w/ while dealing w/ Bub.  I get asked if I want another cat.  ????  no.   Then I get into the sanctuary and note it is set up for a concert.  My whole soul drops to the bottom of my feet.  Bub does not deal w/ loud music well.  Grandma and Grandpa aren't here.  I prepare to leave within 5 min of the music starting.  I hate doing that.  I gear myself up for this, and I will be leaving almost as soon as I get there.

Here is the amazing part:  It was a family that played bluegrass.  Bub was completely mesmerized by this family and their music.  He sat the whole time and listened.  no fussing.  no screaming.  no trying to run away.  He wanted to hold both Joe and my hands.  He wanted me to help him clap in time w/ the music.  He clapped between the songs all by himself w/o any prompting that it was time to clap.

We gave them a large (for us) donation.

I was teary eyed watching Bub enjoy himself so much.

I am a sap.

The music itself was very inspirational.

I need to trust more that God is giving me the right directions, even when I don't feel up to following them and I'm dragging my feet.

After the service I brought Bub up to the leader of the family (the dad) and told him that Bub has never liked live music and has never sat thru an entire service w/o fussing, and that he loved the music so much.  I asked Bub to say "Thank you", and Bub signed "Thank you" and shook his hand.  He asked if Bub was deaf, and I had to explain that Bub has autism, and that he can hear and understand fine, he just can't/won't talk *we're still trying to decide that one*.  He gave us a CD, but I had Joe put some extra cash in the CD donation box.
If you can inspire my son that much, I will throw money at you.  Even tho I'm mostly broke.

If you get a chance check out their website....  The Hartley Family

As always Joe and I got into a "mock" argument about whether or not bluegrass is country.  My stand is that it isn't...bluegrass is to country as dixie is to jazz.    Joe laughed at me.  I know he thinks he's right.  I'll let him think it if it makes him happy, cuz right now...I am super happy.


Thursday, November 24, 2011

Happy Thanksgiving pictures!

the "G" needs a little work....

Broccoli Salad- w/ Bacon!!!  yum!

Momma & Zber!

If I photoshop a tree in the back, we could have our Christmas picture here  :)

This was the 2nd attempt....

She squints when the red light comes on cuz she knows it's about to flash at her...

Just look at that nose!  lol!

Me and my Bub...w/ a mouth full of Dr. Pepper....

Chocolate truffle pie!  Bub devoured his piece.

Happy Thanksgiving!

This year is a year to be thankful about.  Zber is slowly beginning to verbalize, she now will "Moo" with me, and we are still hearing "up" and "no" and "byebye"  Bub is able to write his entire alphabet and 1-20 all by himself w/o any prompting.  Joe has started designing again, and I have a new job in a pediatric unit.

We are going to Grandma Dorlaine's and Grandpa Ken's for Thanksgiving lunch in a little bit. My contribution is broccoli salad and a dairy-free version of Chocolate trufle pie.  One of the BEST chocolate pies I ever had, thank you to Lindy Loo from "Yeah, that Vegan Shit".  but although we are not vegan (at all) vegan recipes are the best for us to use for deserts for Bub's food allergy to all and any milk products.

so I am off to shower and wake zber from her nap (she has been enormously crabby today).  Love you all, and God Bless us all!


Sunday, November 20, 2011

So, Joe tells me the kids drove him crazy today while I was at work.  I believe him.  They are both still awake and protesting bedtime.  Z goes to bed at 6:30 normally, Bub is in bed by 7pm.  it is 8:30 right now.  I just changed Z's wet diaper and rocked and sang to her.  She wouldn't settle down, and kept trying to play peekaboo, and pulling off my glasses.  Momma said, "no ma'am"  and put her back in bed. I also fed them before I put them to bed, as Joe didn't realize the pork chops I prepared (uncooked) was intended for him to pop in the oven to cook to feed the family for dinner.

This working days is not working well for me. My kids get hyper when they finally get to see me, right before the go to bed.  hyper and bedtime are not a good mix.

Bub started crying when he heard me get home.  I have no idea why.  then after lots of hugs and kisses, he got hyper that I was home.  after eating he got even more hyper.  he started settling down after we did his bedtime routine, but he is still up.  I hear him playing w/ his "Leapfrog refrigerator DJ" toy (previously referred to as "anni-oo" d/t song #3 on the alphabet 'channel'). He hums along w/ the songs.  his favorites are '20 little leapfrogs', 'Birdie bye bye', and 'the Uppercase letter song'.  He used to love 'Anni-oo' and drew pictures of the little guy dancing the "anni-oo" until momma started singing the song all the time and getting him to do the 'Anni-oo' dance with me.  Now when I ask him to play "anni-oo" he giggles and plays every OTHER song on this thing. 

anyhow.  long day.  I have 1 day off and then 2 more on.  I hope 1 day with momma is enough for the kids to be ok w/ no momma for 2. 

Nite & Nubs.

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

He's not big on eating vegetation....

I have discussed before how much I hate grocerying, unfortunately, it is my job, as I am the only one willing to spend the time infront of the PC reviewing the circulars and adding ecoupons on to our grocery store cards, and going thru the coupons my wonderful Mom sends me every week.  I am also the only one determined enough to shop to a budget.

I typically set our food budget to around $150-200 for a 2 week period.  this is not much really for a family of 4 with food allergies... and this also includes diapers, cleaning products, self care products etc... so sometimes it is VERY hard to stay on this budget, and I let not-as-important-things go, like junk food, or fancy cleaning products and get a $1.00 bottle of bleach instead and/or a safe store-brand of cereal and marshmallows and make "cereal bars" in lieu of said junk food that my family craves and inhales at alarming speeds which is another reason I don't buy junk food very often.

so I really love the holiday season where I can take advantage of sales like $.49/lb full turkey.  I got a 22lb turkey today for $10 and change.  this is the 2nd one I've bought since Nov1.  I'm thawing it out in the fridge and since I have monday off, and it will prolly only be fully thawed by then, I will chop that sucker up, cook different portions in different ways and then refreeze the cooked meat for later meals.  these things make me happy on paper...on monday I will be cursing myself for doing this to myself because the only alternative will be to let the turkey go bad and toss it, which will make me even more mad and further cursing of self will ensue.

anyhow, today was the biweekly shopping trip.  I spent prolly around 2 hours on and off preparing for this trip, I went to 4 different grocery stores (not walmart!!!!!!) according to the receipts I saved a total of $82.13 by taking advantage of store sales and about a dozen coupons (diapers and wipes were included in this trip)...I don't typically use a lot of coupons as I find certain store brands are more likely to be safe for Bub and are still cheaper than the name brand with a coupon.  I was under my budget by about $13!  the only thing I didn't get that I was planning on was some chicken, and that was because the store had sold out of it for the day.    so Yayee to me...the madness I put myself thru pays off, even if I am all pissy while doing it. 

after getting home I have the madness of putting it all away & cutting up the bulk meats into meal-sized portions.  Plus I have decided that while I am working days this month, I will pre-make the next day's dinner so all Joe will have to do is pop it in the oven so I don't have to worry about my kids eating hotdogs and instant potatoes every day I have to work...or ramen....This really does happen.
I have to constantly remind Joe to make sure he feeds the kids either a veggie or a fruit w/ every meal.  He's not big on eating vegetation, so he forgets the kids need it...and I get mad when they don't get vegetation at every meal, and me mad at Joe is a thing Joe likes to you would think I wouldn't need to do the constant reminders...but I do.
we have lots of canned and frozen veggies on hand to help Joe remember.  lol.


Tuesday, November 15, 2011

I'm sure the girl named "Ryan" wished she could bomb me over the phone....

Currently on hold with an online pharmacy that I found that has affordable meds for Bub while we wait for our new insurance to begin in January.  I placed the order on 11/4/11.  On 11/10/11 I was told I should have it yesterday.  I don't.  I know to expect mixups and delays the 1st time using a new service...but come on.  Today is the last day I have his current meds.  I really don't want him to miss a dose.

The website says its being processed...but what does that mean?  that it will be shipped in another week?  It is madness.  All because Bub's med is not a highly used drug, and it's indications for use are limited and must be monitored w/ blood tests and such.  puff.


What is really frustrating me right now is that this chick (she said her name was "Ryan", and I responded w/ "really?"  and she got pissed at said the payment that I posted on 11/4 for this order didn't go thru until yesterday (11/14), however my bank statement says it cleared on 11/8???  something is not adding up here.  I called back to get an explanation from the manager/supervisor since "Ryan" was prolly lying to me w/ my mocking surprise of her "name", or to be charitable she was reading me a line of crappola that her upity-up told her to spew out at disgruntled part-time housewives like me (having been in middle management at telemarketing companies, I know this to be true since I used to be the manager coaching my employees to read crappola to customers when I knew it was a pile of crappola...which is why I am no longer in telemarketing...but I digress...) so anyhow, I call back, spend 20+ min on permahold, get thru, ask to talk to a supervisor, am told  I will be transfered to said supervisor and then am put on a nameless voicemail...prolly where they put the disgruntled part-time housewives that are barely refraining from swearing and usage of other creative conversational devices.  or maybe this guy had creative listening and thought I said "put me to a nameless voicemail box please"  maybe...I am told I have a MN accent....dontcha know.... puff.

(much later)

I tried to call back again...was again on permahold.  got tired of it and had to give up because I really needed to make dinner for my poor family who had been putting up w/ my dramatic sighs over this all day, plus had to get ready to take Bub to his horseback riding therapy (the only one we can afford right now), and be ready to drive immediately to my PRN job once I dropped him off at home.  so it was busy.  Now that I am home from my 1/2 shift, I logged on to the pharmacy site to see if there has been any change to the status.  SURPRISE.  nothing changed.  sent an offline "instant message" requesting enlightenment and a conversation w/ a supervisor to discuss "Ryan"s snippy attitude with me earlier, because as the day continued, I became more convinced it wasn't me, and I had been VERY patient with her and did not swear once at her...although I did do the record-player technique until I am sure she wished she could bomb me over the phone.

And so, sometime on Wednesday I will try to find a conclusion to this abysmal state of affairs.  meanwhile, I filled yet another week of the risperidone ODT for Bub for the "low low" price of  $70.00.  Yayee for me. Yayee for expensive not popularly used drugs that jack up the price.  puff.

Nubs to all anyway

Sunday, November 13, 2011

it's better today, kinda...

well, the dishes are done, most of the laundry is cleaned and put away thanks to Joe's helpfulness this morning.  Unfortunately the brakes on our car did something bad last nite while Joe was coming back from his nite with the boys.  No accidents or anything, but he's at Sears right now attempting to get them fixed.  Bub is at grandma's, and Zber is chillin w/ me, half watching TV and half playing w/ sidewalk chalk.  (alright...really she's kinda EATING the chalk everytime I turn my back....guess I'll be getting out some miralax for her tonight to counter the extra Ca2...puff)

I made Yabluchnyk this morning (Ukrainian Apple Cake), and we have 3 pieces left.  Bub kept sneaking off w/ apple slices while I was doing all the prep work.  I discovered that my egg-cutter also is wonderful for slicing peeled apples into uniform slices...and that Bub is able to help me cut apples now w/o my having to worry if he will slice off his fingers.  Yayee, one more thing I can let Bub help me with in the kitchen!!!

Little Kitty Masquerade and Zber tussle like puppies, and Bub gets concerned/jealous of/for Zber and splits them up which ends in massive Zber crying.  I tell Joe that I have no idea how he does it every day and that YES I WILL get him a membership to the fitness center associated w/ my new job....esp since it has free day-care while you work out and they have no issues/limitations with us bringing our son w/ non-verbal autism. this time they have no issues with it....that may change after a few times we visit with him....sigh,

Must dash.  Nubs all today.  :)

Saturday, November 12, 2011

I know better

I wish my camera was working so I could show you how horrible my kitchen is right now.  Joe made an attempt on the dishes earlier this week, but neither of us actually finished doing them.  At some point in the last 3 days one of the kids (prolly Bub) spilled cereal or graham crackers on the floor and they have been crushed to a fine dust that sticks to my feet as I walk across the floor.  I cleaned the counters at some point yesterday and they are cluttered w/ koolaid stains and I have no idea what else.  My living room is cluttered with toys and clean and dirty clothes and cat toys.  there are unidentifiable crushed crumbs and chocolate soymilk stains all over my couch.
I spent an hour already today picking up all the diapers off the floor of my bathroom when the bathroom trash overfilled with diapers and scrubbing the effin toilet clean and the sink and the floor, and random poo stains off the walls around the tub from Bub poo episodes this week while I was at work.

I can not wait to be back on nights.  when I work nites I can at least keep the mess at bay.  poor Joe is going nuts by the time the kids go to bed and when I get home I'm so tired.  neither of us are doing anything to dent the chaos created by our little darlings. 

I need to do the dishes. If I just start, I'll keep going...maybe...if I am lucky.

Monday, November 07, 2011

Bub did it for two days in a row

That's right.  My Bub has pooped in the potty 2 days in a row.  I am speechless.  he did it on his own.  no prompting from either Joe or I.  Both times it was during his pre-bed-time bath.  I guess he's finally connecting the urge to go with the actual action of pooping.  I am so excited about this.

When we were first going thru adjusting to Bub's diagnosis of autism, there actually was a support group in the area (it's non-existent now)  there were parents and grandparents there that had older kids/young adults with varying levels of ability.  Most of them tried to reassure me that potty training *probably* would happen since Bub has a fairly high level of functioning, and that pretty much it would be around 7 y/o.

At the time, Bub was barely 3, and my heart was falling...4 more years of diapers...if I'm LUCKY??!?!!??!!!!

sometimes, what is said to bring hope will crush the soul of the recipient.  Yeah, that was pretty soul crushing.

but it seems that they were pretty dead on.  I wonder why 7 seems to be the magic number that people told me to expect positive changes.  I have had several people tell me that.  it's odd, and getting harder and harder to dismiss.  Today in addition to the previously mentioned accomplishment, I walked into his room and found him writing his alphabet on a dry-erase board with a washable marker. (the door was closed so no Z-marker incident)  He gets to S on his own now (usually), after "s" he does a row of "H" (all capitals, no lowercase "h") then resumes the alphabet at "U". (I think this is a type of 'elaboration')  He's getting much better with remembering "M"s point down, and "W"s point up.  He's not mixing them up as often anymore.  He is still having some hard times distinguishing between "S" and "5" tho...but then my "5" look like "S" half the time, so peh.

As for my Zber, she is beginning potty training too.  She now knows to pee when we sit her on the potty.  And she is ALL over putting TP in the potty and pulling the flush.  She loves flushing the toilet.  she also loves throwing toys in the toilet if she manages to sneak in there when we are looking...but so far, nothing has gotten stuck, and we have not needed to call a plumber or our landlord. *whew*

She is starting to join in on the hand-movements for itsy-bitsy spider now.  not everytime, but enough to make this mommy all teary eyed thinking about it. (Bub has yet to join in yet...ever.)

nite all.  one more day off and then the next 2 days of my unit orientation (Yayee).


Thursday, November 03, 2011

My color is yellow

I don't know that I entirely agree with that.  when I read the personality traits to Joe for this color, he snort-giggled a lot in agreement (yes my hubby can snort and giggle simultaneously)...I'm still not sure if I should pull out the "mad" at him or not.

The biggest disagreement with this color, is that they are described as extroverted.  I am NOT extroverted.  I know I do this bloggy-thing and "self-publish", but that's because I can hide behind my PC, and you only see the "Good" pictures and so what if I'm slightly silly...most of you don't know me, will prolly never meet me...and if you are 7 of my 8 followers, you already know what an incredible nerd I really am and love me anyhow- so I can do the silly shit and not have a panic attack about it.

But that last part of the sentence, after the hyphen, actually was a very "yellow" statement....maybe you can be a shy-extrovert?  would that be like an Internet stalker?  you go and read all these posts and never comment, except as "anonymous"?  huh.

well, I made 2 people's day today...2 fairly gray/silver older gentlemen.  The 1st was on my elevator ride up to orientation.  I happened to be the one by the floor buttons, and I didn't hear the older gent tell me what floor he wanted, so when everyone else got off I asked him if I missed his floor.  He assured me I didn't, and I said something ridiculous like "well, I'm kinda the 'floor master' here...wanted to make sure I didn't miss you"..the way I say silly things like that w/ lots of animated hand-movements, quotation marks, and unconscious ASL signing.  He started laughing told me he really needed that, then launched into an excessively sad story about a friend of his that was having health problems.  !!!!?   I did the empathy sad face and listened...cuz the "yellow" in me can't walk away from someone w/ a sob story.  Then at lunch, I was waiting for someone in the cafeteria to get their utensils and some elderly gent with a limited number of teeth told me I was pretty....I said "Thanks, but I feel like I've passed the age where you still feel like you can be pretty" (while laughing of course...It's much easier to 'insult' yourself while laughing, and you usually get people to contradict you and then hear all sorts of nice things about yourself without sounding like you are fishing for complements....

Dear Lord, I really am a yellow personality.  Please help me not to be so unconsciously manipulating when possible.  Amen.   :(


I was attempting to do the NaBloPoMo  this month, however I failed on day 2 to post.  I sat down the the PC after work, shopping and feeding & putting to bed of the kids and promptly fell asleep.  Joe chased me to bed after some unknown point and I completely forgot to post. boo.  no prizes for me.  bummer.

This is definately an "I-suck" labeled post.  :(

Tuesday, November 01, 2011

2nd day

Today I got to meet all sorts of people I will be working my new user ID and passwords that don't work yet, but are promised to work by tomorrow.  Which is especially good since all I do tomorrow is computer-stuff I have to be logged in to do.

I have determined that I will need to bring my own lunches and snacks to work since I have been feeling oogy after lunch the last 2 days.  That kinda sucks cuz it means I need to be pretty proactive and plan-aheady so I don't just get caf' food cuz I didn't bring anything...  boo.

Bub is at Windridge right now, with Joe and Z.  If I haven't shared before, Bub is learning 2-point riding on a new horse named Dancer...again, will post pictures once I get a working camera.  As I mentioned the last few days, Bub is having a hard time w/ controlling his negative emotions in a constructive way.  I am starting to be fairly concerned about it as we are putting all his insurance-covered therapies on hold until my new insurance kicks in.  And I have to get documentation that he has been uncovered for less than 63-days so that his "pre-existing condition" will be covered by our new insurance.  Don't you love how YOU as the consumer have to be on top of these clauses and exceptions to ensure you get what you need.  the only reason I even know about this is that I saw "without pre-existing conditions" in very fine print. and started to ask questions.  yes there is one of "me" in every group to the underinformed HR rep's dismay.  haha-kinda.

Anyhow...hope tomorrow is just as good.  nite.  :)


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