Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Tribute to Susan Predoehl

as I was driving to my Chemistry test, I was listening to my His People 91-92 tape, and the last song is an arrangement Mr. Dicke made for "Jesus let us come to know you" that Susan had a solo part for. And as I was listening to it, I thought, "MAN, she has such a pretty voice...why didn't I ever notice that before?" (this is 10+ years since I first heard it)
Then I started to remember and think about Susan. She was, hands down, the most encouraging and kind person I have ever known in my life.
In my freshman year, when I was trying SO hard to be good in track, she was the only person that would stick with me during our practice runs out in the streets of a certain suburb where people drove AWFULLY fast down county rd B-C. She stuck with me in the slush and crappy-icy streets when she could have finished her 5-mile run already. No one else would slow down enough to stick with me the first couple of weeks before my time started to go up.
She was ALWAYS smiling, and trying to be helpful. I can not remember ever hearing her say anything negative about anyone.
Then she came to visit me after I moved back from the east coast before she moved to CA, and then I lost touch with her. So sad. :(

Why is it that when we are really young, we don't have the wisdom to see the value in people? Why is it that as a teen I was SO preoccupied with stupid people that were completely out of my life within 5 years? Why is it that I only appreciate some of the best people that ever wandered into my life after they have wandered out of it?
Why did I think some of the worst people that were in my life at that time were so fascinating?

Liz wrote me that she turns old next month.
I wonder if that is what is happening to me (after I wrote back and told her she's being silly), and that's why I'm waxing philosophical, waning sense.....

Anyhow; Susan, even if you never see are the most kind and encouraging person I have ever known, and I wish I could be more like you. :)

Now- for my Mom, another bub photo!

FYI- this balloon didn't lose it's buoyancy for 2 weeks, that's right 14 days. I have never seen a standard He balloon (not the metallic kind) last that long.
Bub loved it. :) It helped him get thru his ear infection. He'd hold the string and kind of pull and punch it and watch it go up & down with a sad, kind of pathetic smile that made me hug & kiss him and tell him he'd get better soon.
*sigh* and now he is! Yayee!


Sunday, November 25, 2007

crabby after a nap

He's so cute when he's all crabby.
his lower lip gets very pouty.

He's going back to school tomorrow after healing from his week and a half ear-infection.
NO yeast over-growth! WooHoo! the antibiotic nailed the ear infection & the probiotic kept his poor little intestines happy! Momma's got the balance thing going on!

So, hopefully he will have a very happy 1st day back in school after 2 weeks of intensive Momma care, and will remember how much he loves going to school, his teacher, & Miss Lee! (and not weep on Momma's shoulder when he realizes I'm going home without him for a few hours)

Nubs to all, and to all a good nite!

Thursday, November 08, 2007

disturbing commercials

So, I'm disturbed by the nintendo "wii" commercials. Those two guys that say "wii would like to play" give me the willies!
There is something about those two guys that make me think of sicko hard-core anime.

Now it is a rule to change the channel during those commercials...

that was the thought, so now I am done.

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

GF/CF chocolate cake! *finally*

Woo Hoo!

Finally found & moderated a chocolate cake recipe my little bub can have! Do you have ANY idea how exciting this is for me?!?!?!
Do you have ANY idea how hard it was to find a recipe that worked just without dairy products, and then to add non-wheat flour to the mix?!?!?!?

I firstly have to give a HUGE credit and thank you to Dorlaine for pointing me in direction for this cake. If she had not shown me the recipe for regular "wacky cake" I would NEVER have tried it, because the ingredient list is, well, wacky. SHE also invented the frosting! I would have never believed you can make a good tasting frosting without actual REAL butter, but she proved me wrong & boy am I happy about that! (FYI, this cake is vegan too.....just in case anyone cares....) (I find that vegan foods are sometimes my friends, even tho I think total veganism is plain silly and a poor nutritional choice, but that's just me....[God gave us use those on meat....every animal God made that has incisors eats meat.....just a thought.....])

So here it is.....
GF/CF Wacky Chocolate Cake
2 cups GF/CF all-purpose flour (I like Bob's Red Mill brand)
1.5 Cups sugar
1.5 tsp GF/CF baking SODA (I like walmart or clabber girl brands)

6 Tbsp GF/CF unsweetened coca powder (Hershey's is pretty reliable)

Mix these ingredients in an ungreased 8x8in pan VERY WELL. better yet, sift it all together so you don't get flour clumps b/c if you have flour clumps parts of the batter won't rise correctly when baking.

Stir in
.5 cup oil (I use olive or canola)
1 Tbsp vinegar (white GF- walmart is VERY good with allergen labeling...FYI)
1 tsp GF/CF vanilla (McCormicks is usually reliable)
1 Cup water.

Mix until smooth, it will fizz and bubble on you a bit, so mix slow. I recommend using a glass pan so you can look at the bottom to make sure everything mixes right. I find that non-wheat flours mix differently than "regular" flour, and absorb water and oil at different rates. The brand of GF/CF flour I am using has a few different flours in it, so it isn't just one kind (like rice, or potato, etc...) So make sure EVERYTHING is blended before you put it in the oven.

Bake at 350 F for 35-40 min (again, the water absorption is different, and takes longer to cook fully). Let cake cool in pan then frost in pan. :)

Here's the Dorlaine-invented yummy non-dairy CF frosting! :)
(just eye-ball the amounts for what you need, but this is a good starting point)
.25 cup crisco
.25 cup PB (I like skippy)
2 Tbsp coca powder

1 cup powdered sugar

1-3 tsp soy milk (I like Silk Brand)

.5 tsp vanilla

If it looks lumpy, add more sugar.
If it looks clumpy, add a little more soy milk .
You can adjust the PB/vanilla/coca powder to taste.

Now as a
special treat, here's some photos of bub last month.


Monday, October 29, 2007

Reflection on my 2nd Chemistry Test...

So here I am feeling all depressed. Not because I did bad...I did good (don't know the grade yet tho, but I knew what I was doing on the test, so that's a good sign, right?!?!)
I feel bad, b/c as soon as I finished and got into lab, one of the other "returning to school momma's" said to me, "I hope you didn't get 100% this time and ruin our curve".

Now what kind of horrible thing is that to say? I worked REALLY hard to do good on this test. I skipped an autism event that I was really looking forward to for over a month to study because I felt I didn't know the material well enough. I DO NOT miss autism events for things that aren't just as important to me.

Now I understand that I am not a single mom that has to work full or half-time, take care of the kids and do 12+ hrs of school. I get that, but still, I worked my tail off and it really bums me out that people resent me for that. It's not like in high school where I got A's and B's and didn't even work at brain isn't that great anymore....I have to drill myself and hold myself to a disciplined plan to make sure I understand the concepts. I swear, for each concept it takes me 1/2 hour- 1 hour to fully understand it and be able to do a problem correctly without having to check the sample problems while doing the problem I'm working on. (did that make sense, or did I get rambly?) So to complete each chapter's homework, I'm spending an average of 2-4 hours a day on it. (some days that's all I do while Mr. Man's at school....other days I try to do householdy type stuff....grocerying, cleaning, laundrying, etc....) (like my gerrunding?) *THHPT*

On the other hand, my lab partners love me because I do the equations......and we do the lab right and get out pretty fast.....


Send me pity so I can sit in the corner and say..."poor me....I have to work hard to get good grades.....oh life is so hard...."


I like the "moment of sarcasm". It made me laugh a bit....I think I will make it a semi-regular feature......
What do you think?

I think Joe's almost got the picture part of the PC fixed so I can post pictures of Bub's 1st day of school and my new short hair soon.
(that's right, I CHOPPED it off!!!!! Nearly bald girl posting! (not really nearly bald...that was a joke....."go on and laugh boy!".....) (you get points if you know who I was quoting......)

(i feel better now)

Tuesday, October 09, 2007

reflections on autism I

So yesterday I spent some time going to some of my online autism groups and found a few sites of adults with autism who do blogs. Some of them made me feel so hopeful for Bub's progress, some of them made me sad in reading about their struggles in trying to fit in a world that is confusing and different for them. One guy talked about how using pot helped him fit in with neurotypical people, that made me REALLY sad.

This kind of tied in with an experience I had about a week ago. I was at walmart getting some stuff and I saw a group of young-ish disabled men with a, for lack of better word, helper, helping them decide what kind of groceries they wanted to buy for themselves that week. I just looked at them and started the middle of the dairy section of walmart (what a total freak I am).
It's weird what I was experiencing. I was so happy that they were able to go out and do things for themselves, and that someone cared enough to help them do it and help them feel a sense of independence and ability, but sad with the thought of, is that what bub will be when he grows up? And I noticed how people went out of their way to avoid being near this group, looked at them and made remarks to the other people with them, and that made me cry too. Bub is so cute right now because he is so young, and has blond hair with big brown eyes, and a smile that can melt your heart, but as he grows, some of that baby cuteness will lessen, and the behaviors that other people put off to being young won't be as acceptable as he gets is that change in acceptance going to affect him?
After I got a handle on myself (let's just say I hid out in the toilet paper/paper towel section for a good while pretending to be reading the advertisements on the back of a huge 12-pack of scott's TP in front of my face, all the while thinking "I am such a freak"), I went and found that group of young men and their helper. I smiled HUGELY at each of them and told the helper that I really appreciated what she did and God bless her for the work she does!
(of course I started crying again as soon as I got out of sight of them, and hid out by the windex)

So anyhow, as I am reading some of these blogs written by adults with autism, I found one that was reflecting on whether or not she would take the "cure" to autism if it was ever discovered.
She felt that she wouldn't, because how autism manifests in her life is a part of who she is, and she wouldn't want to take away something that is what she is. This got me thinking as well.

I am often asked/pointed out that sometimes I over-analyze what Mr. Man is doing, and that sometimes what he does is normal for any kid his age. And I agree with this, to a point. I -am- hawk-like in my focus on any change in behavior or abnormality in his physical state (like changes in his "out-put"), but do I know what is just "bub" and what is just manifestations of what is going on in his brain? And then I think, where does autism start and Bub begin? Is there a separation at all?
Really, I don't think there is a dividing line, or if there is, it's very fuzzy and fluid, changing constantly. For example, he sees a teacher/aide he likes in the parking lot as we walk up to school, and they wave to bub. I tell him who it is and ask him to wave back. Somedays he just stares at them blankly as we walk up to school, then other days he smiles as soon as he sees them, and still other days he walks blankly for a bit, THEN gets what I asked him after a min. or so and starts waving in his little way (lifts up his hand and turns it clock-wise a bit). So what's going on there? How can I say "on the days he has instant recognition of the teacher and request, THAT is bub...on the days he doesn't or has delayed reactions, THAT is autism". I think that kind of mentality is crap. It's ALL bub. This is who God created him to be. Is this the total potential of who he is created to be? I don't know, but I will when we get to heaven and we are in our perfected resurrected bodies. I am thankful that I have that hope when things are hard, and he tries my patience, like pulling off his dirty diaper and smearing poop on the carpet, or intentionally spills his juice on the floor to watch the liquid flow.
Anyhow, hope I wasn't too melancholy today- prolly hormones, or something. *wink* It's amazing to me that I'm not back on zoloft yet..heheheh. (maybe I shouldn't laugh too hard at that one) *grin* you know, self-fulfilling prophecies....*erk

NUBS to all!

Sunday, October 07, 2007

rice "pancakes" gf/cf

decided to share one of Bub's favorite EASY gf/cf foods.
I make these really fast before sending him off to school to eat them, his teacher & aide said they wanted some when they gave it to him. :)

1 c. cold cooked rice
1 egg
1 banana
gf/cf canola spray (I like walmart brand)

-mash banana and mix with rice and egg thoroughly
-spray pan surface really well (or it will stick & fall apart when flipped)
-spoon 2 heaping Tbs on pan and cook until side up looks dull
-flip and cook 1 min.

SUPER easy and tastes really good. won't work for SCD diets tho.
it freezes well and can be nuked or toasted, tho Bub usually eats them quickly and tries to sneak more when he thinks I'm not looking. The banana makes it sweet enough that no honey or syrup is needed.
I have also made this with out the banana and substituted spinach and added salt, but although it was acceptable to Mr. Man, it wasn't his favorite either.

Today, I am gathering the nerve to take him to ...."Lab-X", our Church's kiddo activites on Sunday nites. Cousin K is coming along. I took him to one last year (before we knew what was going on with him) and had a horrible time b/c he just had no idea what was going on and just wanted to run up and down the halls.
Several reasons why I am trying this again:
1)Good for his growing faith

2) he's older and might get into it....

3)he's had a few weeks in school and seems to be more open to the concept of "sit still for a while and watch what is happening on the stage, -then- run around w/ other kids"

4)Being around neuro-typical kids who like him for who he is is good for my bub (and good for me to see too)

5)I can't just keep him from the world, however much "easier" it is for me.

anyhow, I'm up for the challenge, and I will think happy thoughts about it. Plus cousin K will be with us to help. I must say that it is amazing in how she mother-hens bub. It's not bossy at all, and Mr. man does listen to her and tries to copy her. He is more likely to copy something she does than something I do. This morning after church, they were sitting up at the kitchen bar drinking some soda grandma got for them, and cousin K taught bub how to clink their bottles together. I actually heard bub try to say "cheers" with her (it sounded more like "cheee-ras").

so that's today, will post more as can.
(hopefully get some .jpg's up too.)


Saturday, October 06, 2007

Autism and diet II, ie- what happened after my last post....

is it irony or poetic justice...I can't remember the actual definitions of those two things anymore...long lost is the desire for an English degree...
So I post the last post, and get set to go out and buy a bunch of alternative flours, and I get a call from Bub's school nurse.
Mr. man has bathroom issues, you need to pick him up.

So now, I have several possiblities of what is going on in his gut...
1) he got casein in on tuesday and is still reacting to it...

2)this is a continuation of the gluten reaction he had on Thursday...

3) his immune system has been weakened by the cold he's been fighting off the last 2 weeks and now he can no longer tolerate gluten which explains Thursday's reaction...(this is the the most likely case in my opinion) (bucket theory of allergens)

4)his immune system has been weakened by the cold he's been fighting off the last 2 weeks and he's getting a yeast overgrowth... (least likely as he has not been on any antibiotics, but I'm not ruling ANYTHING out)(PLEASE don't make me deal with candidas!!! PLEASE)

5) he just has a tummy flu that will go away and not further complicate my life....(unlikely as he has not vomited nor does he have a temperature)

as it is now Saturday and we have not had an exploding training-pants since yesterday afternoon, I am still gravitating to 3 & 5. I wish I could say it is 5, but murphy's law tells me to expect 3, and since Murphy apparently has been my best friend thru much of life....well, you get the picture. *sad grin*

Loves to all.

Friday, October 05, 2007

autism and diet...this is my life.

No pictures today...sorry, still having PC issues...

Yesterday I think bub had a gluten reaction, it was very odd. Imagine hanging out with a very giddy drunk person...that's what it was like. He was all wobbly, he didn't seem able to keep his balance and kept falling over and then laughing like crazy. He would try to grab his stacking rings and over or unshoot them several times before being able to grab them. I watched this behaviour for about 10 min to make sure he wasn't just being silly (cuz sometimes he likes to be silly).
I am SO thankful for E.C.I. and all the different therapies they helped me learn. from what he was doing, it seemed as if his vestibular and proprioceptic sensory systems were WAY out of synch: so we started with spinning supine, upright, and then a couple of sommersaults. Then we did bouncing on his bouncy ball, finally I got him to roll up tight in his fuzzy blanket a few times. I thought about getting out the bean-box, but after spending an hour on these activities, he seemed grounded again, and seemed to have recovered his balance an sense of where his body ended and the world began. I tell is the oddest thing to watch, seeing the total disorientation turn into calmness again. anyhow.

Like I said earlier, I am guessing that he had a reaction to gluten, which is surprising because I tested him for gluten sensitivities back in June when I took him off casein and could not find a difference in behavior with him on or off of it. However, 20 min before he got wonky, I had given him a graham cracker. He really hadn't eaten much wheat before that, he had cereal for breakfast (8am at school) and 1/2 a small roll at lunch 10:45(school again), and then the graham cracker @ 2pm. He was at school the other 2 times he got gluten, so I don't know if he reacted or not. His teacher and aide may not have recognized his reaction even if he did have one, they did say he was very happy during the day, so maybe he did and they aren't as tuned in with him as I am to know that reeling around and laughing his butt off for no reason is not normal for him. really, they have only known him for about 2 I can't assume they would recognize it. And to be perfectly honest, I am SO impressed with how much they will work with me on his dietary restrictions, I mean really! There are only 2 of them and 6 special needs kids. I know for sure that one of Bub's classmates cannot feed himself properly, and I think another one may have difficulties with feeding herself- and mr.Man is ALWAYS all over the place, those women have their hands FULL. I am amazed they even tolerate my manic insistence that Bub only eats what I send him with.
I digress again....So yesterday I decided to test gluten again. So for today thru sunday, Mr. Man will not ingest ANY gluten in any form. This makes my life a tad more complex, but HEY, didn't I always say in my foolish youth that I thrive on stress and challenges? (Won't the Doctor show up in his TARDIS and take me back to myself 10-15 years ago so I can kick myself in the ass a few times? please?!?!)
then Bub has Monday off school (teacher activities stuff) so I have ALL DAY to apply gluten to him and watch for whatever kind of firework-display he'll give me. yayee me. *thhptthp*

I got to go off to one of the local health food stores and buy some alternate ground grains that contain no gluten so bub doesn't freak out over no pancakes, and if I do end up adopting GF as well as CF I already AM doing, I'll have some supplies to get me thru the initial days. I already looked up a bunch of GFCF recipes that I will be experimenting with this weekend.

I just have to hope and pray that he doesn't start having yeast issues next. I really don't want to go thru several rounds of diflucan and even more dietary restrictions, but a mom's gotta do what a mom's gotta do.

Loves to all!

Wednesday, September 26, 2007

sorry- no picture today

Well, here it is. Bub started school last Tuesday. He seems to like it, except for the part when I leave....that he does NOT all. Most days he just grabs my leg and tries to pull me to the door to tell me "let's go momma, I don't want US to be here". That is ok to handle, but today was hard, he started bawling big time. And he's just getting over a cold, so he's not the happiest camper you ever saw with a crusty nose anyway. But, I had to just's going to take a while for him to get over his separation anxiety. He is ALWAYS excited to see me pick him up after school and gives me HUGE hugs and kisses. That's one of many things I love about my bub, he is never shy to show how much he loves somebody. I have watched other 3 year olds (I talking about neuro-typical kids here) and they are already showing signs of not wanting to hug their parents in public...somehow it has already become embarrassing. But I don't think bub is going to experience that embarrassment for a long time. He so wears his emotions on his sleeve...but with autism that is a really good thing. He is very aware of his emotions and I am seeing him be aware of other people's emotions too...he may not understand what response is socially acceptable, but he is getting it slowly, but surely.
Lots of babbling over the last week. I know I am hearing words (this isn't just wishful listening).
I am still hearing "done", and "go" when he doesn't want me to interrupt his current circuit, he's saying "apple" when he is hungry, but doesn't necessarily WANT an apple, it's just his word for "feed me now momma". I did hear him say "bye" to his aide last friday...but no wave yet....that will come eventually I suppose.

Anyhow...I should do stuff and not ramble.
Love to all

Tuesday, August 07, 2007

wow!---yayee me

Just finished registering for this fall semester and decided to actually look at my grades from last term. well guess what? I actually did not get 3 a's and a b. I got 4 A's!!!!


that is all.

Wednesday, July 18, 2007


Please go and read this comic strip! I swear, if I could get away with it, I would do it....


Thursday, July 12, 2007

Another challenge

Now, I'm not complaining, not a bit. It's not "hard"to keep track of all the different therapies I need to keep bub doing.....It's not hard to stay motivated to do all of them...every some cases, every two hours.....(can you hear the sarcasm?)

No, really- most days are fine, but the last two weeks have been hard. As some of you know I have removed dairy (casin) from Bub's diet (VERY CHALLENGING...) and the jury's still out on whether I will go GF as well (gluten free[wheat mainly, but other grains too]...I keep forgetting I didn't know this stuff a month ago, and now it's something Joe & I discuss almost daily.....)
sorry- digressed already....well last weekend Joe gave Mr. Man some hot-dogs & I tell you there was SOMETHING in there that set him off. If I didn't believe diet can affect behavior before...I have NO DOUBT anymore. He had massive meltdowns Friday, Saturday, and Sunday (hotdogs were eaten on Friday and Saturday) and was still touchy on that Monday too (only mini-meltdowns). Now that is one thing I am very thankful for. Mr. Man does not have Massive meltdowns on any kind of regular basis, only when he is super-stressed out (like going to a Doctor or Dentist) and some reaction to the food he eats. It was so bad we had to leave church because he couldn't handle me leaving him at children's church by himself, and then began to meltdown as soon as I convinced him I would stay with him. I was a VERY stressed out Mom that morning.... to make things worse tho, the same time these meltdowns started, we had started a new OT for bub (Occupation Therapy) that I suspected might be causing the meltdowns b/c he doesn't really like part of it (skin brushing followed by joint-compressions b4 we put the ankle weights on), but thankfully I did a double elimination & then started the OT again & no meltdowns....yeayee- it was the hotdogs...wait, did I say yayee...that's one more food I have to avoid.....*sigh*

So as this behavioral trigger is now identified, it is July 3rd and time for our town's fireworks. We decide to take Bub because we can go near the fairgrounds, at Grandpa's work, but not be in the crowds (Large groups of people over-sensitizes bub). As you can see, he enjoyed the firework display and actually focused on it for nearly the whole 1/2 hour display (amazing....),
BUT(of course there is a "but") Joe & I think Mr. Man had some dreams about the fireworks, and couldn't put them in context of where he saw them....he definately had nightmares the next two nights, and since the 3rd, it has taken us 2.5-3.5 hours to get him to fall asleep. This is not happy, esp. since Joe just got a new job that starts at 7am in the morning, and I (by choice mind you) am the one staying with Bub until he is asleep so Joe can get the sleep -he- needs.

Fun, huh?

Sorry this picture is sideways...this is one of the pictures we use to help Bub communicate until he begins talking (speech therapy seems to be helping) He is mainly consistent with this picture & his soy-milk picture (as these are some of his favorite foods...I'm not surprised). Bub is seeming to like using the pictures more than signing, however, it seems he likes ME to sign (ASL) to him rather than make him use the pictures....
But I see this as a positive thing as I am starting to be fluent in ASL, and once I finish school and get into my profession, that could be a HUGE I tell myself so I don't get overwhelmed and depressed.....

Still reading as much as I can, So much to learn, and can be overwhelming. but I decided the changes I do make will be a little slower than they have been. with all the therapies starting since June, it's hard to know which ones made the most difference and how quickly, now that it seems that the major therapies are in place and the new stuff I get are really tweaks of what we are doing, I'm only going to introduce one new thing every week or two (maybe longer in some cases). I'm going to be starting Bub on some supplements, my Aunt recommended a pro-biotic that her son uses, and as I have read a lot about the connection with leaky-gut, and as we know my preoccupation with Mr. Man's end product (literally) I think this is a very good starting point.
Then after that, out Pediatric behavioralist pediatrician recommended Omega-3 to help with his concentration & told us it's the only thing proven to really help so far ( and again, my aunt confirmed this with her experience)
I'm still considering a high B6 w/ magnesium supplement for him, our Behav. pediatrician sz all it will do is give him REALLY yellow pee, but ARI and DAN! and so many other resources say it can really have a positive effect, so I think I will try that too...eventually before his 3rd birthday anyway.
I'm still hoping he will be able to blow out his own candles this year....I'm getting some pinwheels to see if that will help him get it, since blowing bubbles was a bust....he just wanted to pour the solution from one bottle to another.....then eat the bubbles I blow for's cute tho... :)

Wow- I guess I did have a lot to say, didn't I?
Keep smiling, cuz I sure am.
Loves to all!

Wednesday, June 06, 2007

Is that Elton John????

just my bub in cousin K's silly sunglasses!

Not much to say today. Just wanted to post.
Loves to all!

Tuesday, May 29, 2007

here comes the spiderman!

Don't think I have posted any pic's of bub in his spidey-pj's grandma got him last fall, but they are very cute!
Haven't updated much lately, sorry to anyone who likes to read these on a regular basis. I've been really struggling on the motivation for hobbies the last month or so. Finished my finals a few weeks ago, did well, mainly. Then just as my classes are coming to a close I FINALLY get a few different people to listen to me about concerns Joe & I have with Bub's development and don't dismiss me as a paranoid first-time mom.
So Mr. Man is starting to work with ECI (early childhood intervention) and when he turns three we will be receiving help from the local school district. One thing that is REALLY wonderful about ECI here in TX is that they come to our home, instead of me and the bub going to some office. So my little man gets excited when they come over. Right now to start, we are using some what I call weight therapy, Bub wears these ankle weights that are about 1 lbs each for 15 min. every 2 hours. He's only been wearing them since Friday and we are already seeing some really good results (IMHO). He's staying focused on shows and activities, and seems to be listening and comprehending a little better (I have to repeat myself less and don't have to point and show as much to make him understand). Also, all of us have heard him saying words we haven't heard him say before and in the right context (although it is still sporadic and random in timing)- like I was washing hands with him, and as always I was talking to him about the steps we take to wash hands and after we got the soap on I told him to rub-rub and he started rubbing his hands together and said "rub", I play with the weights with him when we take them off to help him feel positive about them for next time too. I usually put them up to my eyes and say "I see you!", NOT ONLY did he imitate me, he said "see you" back to me! (haven't gotten him to say it again tho). and today, Joe was playing with him on our bed and pointing out pillows to bub. Joe asked bub to get a pillow and Mr. Man grabbed our huge body-pillow and said "BIG" really clearly. So that is just HUGE to me.
In addition to the weights, we are also learning ASL as an alternative means of teaching Bub to communicate with us. It's a fabulous series called "Signing time" by little hands productions (go to to see more). Bub really likes watching it & runs to the room when ever he hears the DVD start. I caught him signing leaf, but he was in our room and there aren't any leaves in our room, so I don't know what he was trying to say or do. I have nearly learned all the signs on the DVD and I am trying to use as many signs as I can when I talk with bub. I'm planning on going to the library in the next day or two to get some books on signing.

Anyhow, this is currently my focus, and I have really been putting everything thing else off to the back-burner, so I apologize that I haven't called, written, etc.. like I usually do. I try to get better, but sometimes it's hard for me even to think about anything besides helping and working with my little man. Right now we are working on getting a referral to a developmental pediatrician in one of the nearby towns, but it takes time when it's medicaid, and I don't know if getting a "diagnosis" is going to make any of us feel better/different/etc.. I'm just really grateful the things I have been doing instinctually and the small things I've read about and tried have been helping before I got any additional outside help. Bub is doing much better with eye-contact, he is becoming much more responsive to hearing his name, and can follow simple 2-step requests (like "pick it up and put it in the trash"). He comes and finds me when he wants to show me something and does initiate hugs and sometime kisses with and without prompting.
He still spaces out sometimes, but he comes back much more quickly in the last month or so and he's showing interest in books and drawing! (he still won't let me read books to him for very long tho.)

anyhow, that's whats happening here. Hope you are having a good day where you are.
Love Nina

Tuesday, April 17, 2007


This is what I heard on the radio today driving home from class... Go to this website to read it as I am afraid that since my opinion is DECIDEDLY negative, I could get slapped with copyright infringement issues if I post the "poem" (a-propaganda-choo) on my blog....
It's "we are virginia tech" by -- Nikki Giovanni, University Distinguished Professor of English, VPI&SU

I promise you, I heard the this & was screaming "WHAT?!?!?" in my car at my radio. People driving near me (I was at a stop light) looked at me funny & kinda scooted down in their seats.

This is the MOST tasteless, horrible, insensitive "memorial" poem I have EVER heard in my entire life!
WHAT does this woman think, that ANYONE can compare the life of an elephant (baby elephant no less) to a HUMAN BEING?!?!
If I was there, if my child was one of the 33 people murdered, I would be screaming for this woman's resignation. Who does this woman think she is to preach her political agenda to people who are mourning, to people who are emotionally vulnerable to her propaganda.

And what's with this line...
"We are strong and brave and innocent and unafraid"
INNOCENT? (I think you all know my opinion on the "innocence of man," so I'm not going there.)

UNAFRAID? what cloud is her head stuck in? I don't know about her, but every interview I have watched of students & staff on campus during the shooting IS STILL SCARED 24+ hour later.

So she shoves her agenda down the throats of these poor shocked and grieving people & then hides her message by TRYING to evoke the feelings you get when listening to one of Martin Luther King Jr. speeches. ("we will prevail" much like "we will overcome")
This makes me sick.
I seriously want to vomit.

My heart goes out to all the parents and families and friends of the 33 victims. You are all in my prayers even if I don't know any of your names. I am outraged that this woman has degraded the memory of your precious children for the sake of her political views.
I pray that the LORD gives you comfort and hope.

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

rainy day!

The umbrella is Bub's new friend (after he broke a tine, of course...)
He will bring it over to me, and move my hand to the underpart to tell me he would like me to open it for him...(thankfully, that part still escapes him, for now anyways....)
It was all rainy yesterday morning, so I decided to slap those yellow boots on & grab the blue umbrella & my trusty digitial camera (have I ever said how much I love this thing?) & go to it.

Can you tell mr. Man is having a great time? little bugger only figured out that umbrellas only work to keep you dry if you hold it OVER your head once the downpour started...
naturally, Momma had NO umbrella, so guess who got soaked...much like my Dad getting "skunked" on the fishing trips we took as kids. (at least Bub didn't poke my eye out with the umbrella like I "hooked" Dad with my fishing poll....)

It was hard getting a good picture, he was on the go & with the lighting, my camera kept delaying the shot for the proper aggrivating, but still, some really cute ones came out -Fairly- well.

Well, happy Wednesday to all! :)

Sunday, March 25, 2007

Big boy!

Just comparing the bub from last year to this year. About this time last year in the great snow state, we were digging out our car from a huge double whammy blizzard, and feeding Mr. Man some snow while we could. Now the little guy is out playing in the sunshine & moving little people from the bus to his new airplane.
I ask Bub, "Where does the panda go? In the luggage compartment?" he gives me a glazed donut look for a minute and then tries to get me to kiss whatever little people person he is currently holding.... can someone explain this to me?

Anyhow, We had a WONDERFUL day today. Momma woke up "early" (7am) with Bub and did the morning thing with him (brush-brush the teeth, open the blinds & curtain, make the bed, get dressed, kiss the fluffy....) and then got ready for Church. Mr. Man played with his little people while getting his morning choco (which was actually vanilla flavored milk, but it's still choco....)..did the shake-shake dance (instead of saying "shake your body/booty" we say "shake-shake-shake, shake-shake-shake, shake your sippy...etc..")

Then we went to church, but no one showed up to teach children's church. My friend Kim and I decided we should go ahead and do it. It was hilarious to me watching Bub zoom in and out of the group activities. He would be intently watching the other kids listening to our lesson, then all of a sudden he would dump out a bucket of blocks, & put it over his head and babble to himself. We talked about how Jesus wanted the disciples to be Fishers of Men, and made Puffy-fish out of paper, staples and tissue! Then we took the whole lot outside to play on the playground. Kim's son made up this alligator/crocodile game that all the kids (except bub) played with great enthusiasm...mostly, for a while anyhow. I had such fun watching all the kids play and had to laugh when they all looked at me funny for wanting to play "Duck, Duck, Grey Duck" (I'm sorry, "duck, duck, goose" is just SO wrong....) I guess it's just a northern-midwest kind of thing....
Then we went out to Lunch with Kim's family and had such a good time!!!!
So that was really a great morning & I enjoyed it, but....once we got home & I put Mr. Man down for his nap, I fell asleep maybe I need more coffee....

Love to all!

Wednesday, March 21, 2007

Mowin' with Daddy

Here is the bub mowing the lawn with daddy.

He ABSOLUTELY loves mowing the lawn.
We go to home depot/Lowe's and he makes a break for the lawn mowers. He hops on one & make "brooovmmm"-y kinds of noises.
We go near the garage & he gets totally excited.

It is so cute to see Mr. Man & his daddy go vrooming down the lawn.

Just wanted to share.

Loves to all!

Thursday, March 08, 2007

Another example of my nerdiness

So, as I posted last night I did my art project b4 I went to bed. I wasn't REALLY happy with it, and kept thinking about how I wasn't REALLY happy with it. I showed it to Dorlaine, and She's SO sweet, but I know it wasn't very good. See here.

The project is to Show 4 out of the 9 principles of the illusion of Depth.

So, Even I think this is not good, so while Mr. Bub is sleeping I try again, and come up with this one.

I like it better, but for some reason it makes me thin of those old Bombay Gin ads....
FYI the 9 principle of the illusion of depth are:
1:Relative size (scale)
3:Position/veritical rise
4:Relative value
5:Atmospheric Perspective (fuzzy and dark in the distance)
6:Linear Perspective (parallel lines meet at horizon)
8:Isometric Perspective (rectangles become paralellograms, and circles become ovals)
9:Warm colors advance and cool colors retreat

And knowing me, anything I do will have to have some kind of surreal-type influence.

So we'll see how this turns out.
Love to all!

Wednesday, March 07, 2007


Finished all my tests and projects for this CrazY-WeeK-Of-INSAnity-That's-nOt-MidTerMs-but-SURE-FEELS-THAT-WAY

I have spring break off next week (wah? Shouldn't that be near Easter????!)
So, since we don't do Midterms, they give us tests and tell us they aren't mid-terms...
Get it? I'm still confused on that one....

Anyhow, I finished my Art-Appreciation project just a while back & am taking a few moments to play on my blogs before I hit the sack.
The HUGE Human Development test I was SOOO worried about? I got an A! Yayee!!!

This is how big a nerd I am during tests:
1- I answer all the questions.
2-I go thru my answers to make sure I still agree with them & mark the ones I question my first impression on.
3-I go thru the ones I marked to triple check, and change them depending on my confidence level.
4-I sit & stare at the scan-tron and count: a- how many questions I changed answers to, and b. how many I marked.
5- I then make sure I am comfortable with the idea that everyone of those questions I just counted could be wrong, and is that I grade I can live with?
6- If "yes", turn in
7-If "no", secretly bite my nails & turn it in anyhow.

What made this experience worse/better...was he was grading it for us right away, so no suspense. UNFORTUNATELY, I sit in the front (b/c I am a nerd...proud of it....) So I hear the comments he makes to my classmates as he shows them their score. Most of what I heard was "you can do better.", "I hope you do better next test", etc... *"shake in boots"mode*

So after completing steps 1-5, I realize I could have upto 15 out of 100 wrong. My Prof put the scale on the whiteboard, and 15 off would put me at a B, so I do the secret nail bite & go to the "DESK OF DOOM" (ba-ba-ba-boom) ONLY 10 of the 15 wrong! PLUS! I got 2 extra credit points for a in-class project I did a couple weeks ago! So I had a 92 & the cut off was 90.

THEN to compound the nerd-within, after I get a compliment from him for paying attention in class, I start walking to my car, realized I am SO jittery from the anticipation of this test & then the resulting calm (?) of passing well, I do not think I can drive safely. The closest approximation I have to this is MAYBE when I drove from MN to TX in July 98 (shane's wedding) by myself, and didn't stop for the night anywhere and was hopped up on NO-DOZ and coffee... THAT kind of shaky, where if you HAVE to drive you can, but it's better if you don't, you know? So I kill time & call Joe until my equilibrium has returned.

So long story short. I am the ultimate nerd. and I'm getting old, now that I know better than to push myself too hard. Oh, the joy of youthful stupidity vs the ability to laugh your pants off at yourself.

Love to all, please don't tease me too hard on this one.

Monday, March 05, 2007

Ahhh, Childhood...thanks Shane...

My commentary will be in Pink....b/c this is WAAAY too close to reality...


You had that Fisher Price Doctor's Kit with a stethoscope that actually worked. Still have it!

You owned a bicycle with a banana seat and a plastic basket with flowers on it. Inheritied my Sister's...

You learned to skate with actual skates (not roller blades) that had metal wheels. - with one skate on & the other off for EXTRA balance...

You thought Gopher from Love Boat was cute (admit it!) -Well, he's a definite sight better from Dr. Bricker! & didn't you just love it when Gopher & Juile were having a "thing"????

You had nightmares after watching Fantasy Island. -Tattoo still scares me, I found a fairy tale theater tape where he is Rumplestilskin, and it is CREEPY!

You had either a "bowl cut" or "pixie", not to mention the "Dorothy Hamill".

People sometimes thought you were a boy. - Had the Dorothy Hamill, NOT a good look for me....

You had rubber boots for rainy days and Moon boots for snowy days.

YEAH! You owned a "Slip-n-Slide", on which you injured yourself on a sprinkler head more than once. -MY MOON BOOTS CHANGED COLORS!!!! no slip-n-slide, we got the garden hose & the sprinkler only...

You owned "Klick-Klacks" and smacked yourself in the face more than once ! _ I was darn good at the klick-klacks! I can still do it, but they don't have them on string!

Your Holly Hobbie sleeping bag was your most prized possession. -No Holly hobbie sleeping bag, But My sister & I had the doll & her friend. We both liked the friend better & fought about who would play her, we considered Holly Hobbie a grime-stone primarily...

You wore a poncho, gauchos, and knickers. - I had an -awesome- crocheted pancho in a odd shade of blue...I think we found it in a garage sale....

You begged Santa for the electronic game, Simon.
Never got it, Dad thought it was a waste of Money I guess...

You had the Donnie and Marie Dolls with those pink and purple satiny shredded outfits, or the Sunshine Family. I didn't, but my friend Mia did. I was Jealous!

You spent hours in your backyard on your metal swing set with the trapeze. The swing set tipped over at least once. - nope, Dad poured concrete down so we wouldn't kill ourselves as children.

You had homemade ribbon barrettes in every imaginable color. (Oh yeah!) .
- My sister had a pair with yellow feathers on the ends and she NEVER let me wear them...*sniff*

You had a pair of Doctor Scholl's sandals (the ones with hard sole & the buckle). You also had a pair of salt-water sandals. -Nope, Mom was SUPER weird about shoes. We got swayed Buster-browns in Day-glo colors...(maybe I exagerated the color part....)

You wanted to be Laura Ingalls Wilder really bad; you wore that Little House on the
Prairie-inspired plaid, ruffle shirt with the high neck in at least one school picture; and you despised Nellie Oleson!

You wanted your first Kiss to be at a Roller Rink!

PONG! ("video tennis" ) was the most remarkable futuristic game you've ever heard of !

Your hairstyle was described as having "wings" or Feathers" and you kept it "pretty" with the comb you kept in your back pocket. When you walked, the "wings" flapped up and down, looked like you were gonna "take off"

You know who Strawberry Shortcake is, as well as her friends, Blueberry Muffin and Huckleberry Pie. I NEVER got any strawberry shortcake & I had to beg until I was blue in the face to get My Little Ponies in 5th grade. I was so deprived from the mainstream marketing....

You carried a Muppets lunch box to school and it was metal, not plastic.

With the thermos inside some were glass inside and broke the first time you dropped them. I think I had this set....

You and your girlfriends would fight over which of the Dukes of Hazzard was your boyfriend. -Actually, my friends and I fought over who could be daisy, or Princess Leia. By the time we got tired of that, we played Charle's Angels instead b/c there were enough girl-parts to go around...

YOU had Star Wars action figures, too! LOVED it!

It was a big event in your household each year when the "Wizard of Oz" would come on TV. Your mom would break out the popcorn and sleeping bags! You better believe it!

You often asked your Magic-8 ball the question: "Who will I marry.

Shaun Cassidy, Leif Garrett, or David Cassidy?" This was more my sister....I was fixated on Paul McCarthney..

You completely wore out your Grease, Saturday Night Fever, and Fame soundtrack record album. I learned how to do the Hustle before I was 5.... bah-bah-bup-ba-da-dah-daaaa

You tried to do lots of arts and crafts, like yarn and Popsicle-stick God's eyes, decoupage, or those weird potholders made on a plastic loom.

You made Shrinky-Dinks and put iron-on kittens on your t-shirts!

You used to tape record songs off the radio by holding your portable tape player up to the speaker. Yes, but more often I would hold the recorder up to tape my mom's beatles albums.

You had subscriptions to Dynamite and Tiger Beat. No

You learned everything you needed to know about girl issues from Judy Blume books. (Are you there God, It's me, Margaret.) I read them, but didn't like many of them...

You thought Olivia Newton John's song "Physical" was about aerobics. (?? its not??)

You wore friendship pins on your tennis shoes, or shoelaces with heart or Rainbow designs. OH YEAH!

You wanted to be a Solid Gold Dancer.
Don't you ?

You drowned yourself in Love's Baby Soft - Which was the first "real" perfume you ever owned. eww!

You glopped your lips in Strawberry Roll-on lip-gloss till it almost dripped off. ack! that stuff was AWFUL!


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